Longshot
by evermre
Summary: Doug was good, Doug was kind, Doug was safe, but Jay knows he could never be enough.


There's nothing wrong with Doug, not really.

He just isn't enough for Evie.

(The small Isle infected part of Jay points out the disparity between both their looks, but the changed, Auradon part of him, pushes that thought away as soon as it pops up).

Jay knows, he's been by Evie's side long enough to know what she needs in a relationship, and what she wants in her partner. Doug was some of those things, but not all, and if Jay knew Evie he knew that she wouldn't settle for anything less than _everything_ she deserved.

Yet, she's still walking around, hand in hand with Doug, her head on his shoulder, and Jay has to wonder why she let him stay for so long.

He knows everybody can see it, the way she hesitates before she leans in to kiss him, the way her shoulders tense when he draws her in for a hug. She didn't want it anymore, didn't want him anymore, so why does she stay? Why does she continue to act like she's the happiest she's ever been, when he knows, and he knows she knows too, that she isn't?

He'd asked Carlos this one day, and Carlos had just shrugged.

"Maybe she's still in love with him, even if she is a little bored."

 _Love? Yeah, right._

Maybe they had something close, something similar, but Jay knew that none of them, not any of them, could ever really love someone. Not in the way love is supposed to be like, not in the way people on Auradon loved people. They could wash the Isle away from their skin, but it leaves marks even they cannot touch, and it burns a hole where your heart is, where you learn how to love. He doesn't think they'll ever be able to recover that part of them, no matter how much they try.

Carlos knows this too, it's why he stares after Jane when she isn't looking, why he doesn't talk to her even when he wants to.

If there was any moment where Jay had thought they might've been capable of loving someone, it would've been with Mal and Ben. But he realised too, not too long after, that what they had, while magical, and very very close, wasn't love. Mal says this too, whispers it into the night, so quiet he almost misses it, "He loves me, and I don't doubt that's true. But I don't think he knows that my love is different, from his, and could never be the same. I want this to work though, still, I'll make it work."

And it does. Which had surprised him a little, if he was honest, but it did, it worked. No matter how much Mal would try to explain it to Ben, he could never fully understand, but he tries anyway, and it works.

Jay doesn't think Doug could do that for Evie, Jay doesn't think Doug could even get close.

Doug was textbook, and safe, he doesn't think he could ever even begin to comprehend the complexities behind Evie, or any of them really. Which wasn't his fault, definitely not, Jay knows that.

But he also knows that it didn't mean there wasn't going to be people who did understand, eventually, or people who already do, but just haven't made themselves known yet, so he knows it wasn't as if Evie didn't have any other choices.

So then he's back to his original question, why? Why was she still here, playing the part of the perfect girlfriend, with someone who could never be the perfect boyfriend.

He ends up making his way to his room, with all those thoughts still in mind, hoping he could maybe just sleep it all off with a quick nap, at least until he realises someone's already in his bed.

"Evie?"

Evie, who was for some reason, spread across his bed asleep, slowly stretches up and lets out a small yawn.

"Oh, Jay, I was waiting for you. Guess I accidentally fell asleep."

Then she reaches an arm out to him, an open invitation, and he sighs before getting under the covers with her.

"What are you doing here?"

She hums, closing her eyes for a moment as she gets comfortable against his chest. The action worries him a little. They'd done this a lot back in the Isle, hell, usually it was all four of them crammed into one bed together, but ever since Auradon (ever since _Doug_ ), she hadn't done this with him (he doesn't know about Carlos, but he knows nothing would stop Evie and Mal from still being close like this).

"I don't know. I was just thinking about some stuff, and, ended up here. Maybe I just wanted to see you, I don't know."

Jay frowns just slightly.

"Is something wrong?"

If the way her shoulders tense said anything, it was that he was right.

"It's Doug."

Jay tenses then too, and has to wonder if she was going to say what he thought she was going to.

"I'm going to need a bit more than that."

Evie draws out a long breath, and then lifts her head up from where it was resting on Jay's chest to look at him properly.

"I broke up with him."

 _Oh._

"Oh. You alright?"

Evie half rolls her eyes, leaning back down to place her head against his chest again (he hopes, _prays_ she can't hear how fast his heart is beating).

"Yeah. Yeah? Probably. You saw this coming, though, didn't you?"

Jay pretends to think on it for a moment.

"Well, maybe. You sure you're okay?"

He can hear her sigh again, and then snuggle closer to him.

"I'm fine, really. I was just kinda hoping it would work out, you know? Thought maybe he'd really be like, the one? Or at least, the closest thing I could get."

He just nods.

"He wasn't it, _the one_ , but, there are other fish in the sea, or whatever they say. And anyone would be lucky to have someone like you."

Evie laughs, but not the usual kind, the ones that do funny things to his stomach, this one's mirthless, and bitter.

"What if there isn't? What if Doug was the closest I could get to, to — love, and I've just, messed it all up?"

His grip around her arm tightens just a little.

"And what if there is?"

Evie shrugs.

"You really think so? Like who?"

And then, the next thing that comes out of Jay's mouth, something purely instinctive, and should've probably been filtered out, goes:

"Like me."

As soon as he says those words, as soon as he's sure Evie's heard it, he freezes. He can tell Evie's stiff now too, and suddenly starts to feel warmer against his body, and he really wants to disappear, maybe sink into a hole and never have to come out for the rest of his life. But he had nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide.

For a minute, neither of them move, and Jay scrambles his brain coming up with something to say, anything, but comes up short. Then Evie slowly starts to shift, and he half hopes she might just walk out of the room so he could properly think about how to fix this, but instead she sits up, and turns around to face him.

Jay starts to sweat.

"Do you really mean that?"

Jay blinks, unable to speak.

But he nods.

Evie looks half torn between being angry and being relieved.

He's not entirely sure what that look means.

"You better not be messing around right now, or I'll be really mad."

Jay shakes his head.

He still has no idea where this is going, but doesn't have much time to ponder, before Evie's leaning down and placing her lips on his.

It catches him off guard, and he, for a moment, thought maybe this was all just another one of his dreams, but then Evie starts to pull back, and he realises this was _real_ , she had just kissed him. Knowing that, he then reaches his arm around her waist and pulls her back down, and kisses her, properly this time. She gasps a little into the kiss, but then smiles, and his heart does funny little things behind his chest.

"I'm not saying I could be your, soulmate, or whatever, but, I'll give you everything I have. Promise."

Evie grins, and knocks her forehead into his.

"I know."


End file.
